Today, I feel very convicted. It was my friendt R's bday and I dread seeing her boyfriend there. Just like any blood and tight girlfriends, i'm protective of her. I think R is too good for her. He was separated, focused on his collection of chickens more than the annulment and he swears a lot and said a lot of obscene words to R when he accused her of changing his facebook password. My point is, if he is treating her that way already out of a very trivial matter then how is he going to react or treat her if it is a huge matter. Would he start beating up R soon? So i refused to be in the same room with her boyfriend...so much i was willing to miss Z's baby shower and R's 30th bday.
Good thing Z did not invite him. But he did show up at R's bday of course. I didn't know how to act around him. I don't want to be friendly lest he thinks everything's ok and hurting R again will be ok. So i did what every coward girl would do: pretend he did not exist. Not even if he was standing right there before me. And in that brief moment i felt the firm tugs of conviction.
As we made our way to our car, i kept thinking about what just happened. We were on our way to attend the 8pm service and it was a good 30 minute drive...enough for God to talk to me.
- God calls me to forgive...not to save.
- Jesus would never ignore any person
- I can be there for R without necessarily agreeing with her
- R is too good for him but Jesus is too good for me too, isn't he? Yet Jesus entered into a relationship with me anyway.
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